Watch Your Tongue

        People often say things without thinking. People sometimes make remarks in order to hurt others. Many times people speak without thinking and it hurts others. These times are the worst. 

       We, as humans, have a sensitive side and a tougher wall surrounding it. When our wall has already been damaged, it no longer protects our sensitive side and words hurt more than they should. There are cases where the outer wall is already practically non-existent and the sensitive side is completely exposed.   This is when you need to be careful. The smallest things can set them off and make them think about some ways that aren't true. Here are some examples...

Person 1: *playing their ukulele*

Person 2: Stop that.  It's really annoying.

Person 2: *puts ukulele away and doesn't play for weeks because they're afraid of being annoying*

Mom: *texting daughter* Please don't get your hopes up. You'll just be another burden she has to deal with.

Daughter: *spends every waking moment believing that they are a burden to other people*

I can list so many other hurtful things that people have said without thinking about how it might affect the other person 

"You're such a lazy ass."

"Where's your thigh gap?"

The bottom line is watch what you say because other people hear.

Body Confidence Issues

        I think I've found the source of many of my body image/confidence issues. My Grandma. Don't get me wrong, I love her to death, I just believe, after lots of thinking, that she has had an effect on the way I see myself ever since a young age.

       When I was in elementary school, probably 1st or 2nd grade,, I remember she was staying at my house and she asked me to stand up and put my legs together. I did as I was told and she muttered to herself "you don't have one" then told me I could sit back down. When I asked her what I didn't have, she replied to me " a thigh gap, you don't have a thigh gap". At this time, I didn't know what is was, so she explained. I went to school the next day and I was taught by a woman with a major thigh gap and that's when I started paying attention to my thighs and being jealous of everyone with a gap. I was about six or seven.

       This grandma sews for a living, so she's seen more of my body than I am completely comfortable with. One time, I was trying on something she made for me. It was all good until she decided to point our my back flaws, aka rolls. She said something along the lines of  "oh you've got some rolly pollies now". Before hand, I didn't know what back rolls were, nor did I care, but ever since, I've been really insecure about my back.

       Last of all, my chest, Those of you who know me personally know that I am far from small. I am a larger girl, which automatically gives me bigger breasts. There have been so many times that I would walk into a room and either my aunt, grandma, or mom would make some comment about my chest and how lucky I am to have such big breasts. They would say something regardless of whoever was in the room. Sometimes my dad, or grandpa would be there and they would turn bright red, as would I. When I would express my feelings towards the comments, they would proceed to tell me that they are my families and it's okay. Now that I think about it, it was definitely NOT okay.

    Now at 15 years old, I stray away from anything that shows a little of my stomach or back. I don't wear tank tops, I hate wearing tee shirts, and I wear baggy clothing to hid my bumps and such. I hate my body;I can't even stand to look at myself half the time.

      My message is don't comment on anyone's body unless it is potentially harmful for them.

Why I Decided to Learn ASL

      ASL or better known as American Sign Lanugage is pretty much what it says it is...sign language.
I don't know anyone near me or anything like that who is deaf, so what reason would I have to learn is?

        The first reason is I live about 13 blocks away from the Kansas School for the Deaf, so there is always a chance I could run into someone from there and need to communicate. My second reason is always looked over.

        Before I get into detail about my second reason, i'm going to give some background on why I'm making this post. I have been getting some hate for deciding to learn ASL.I'm not entirely sure why because it is offered as a class at my school. I'm not taking the class because I don't have room in my schedule, but I have other means to learn the language.   I have been told that I have no reason to learn because I don't know anyone who is deaf and that it's offensive in that manner.  If you are deaf and reading this blog and find me learning ASL offensive, please tell me because I don't particularly agree with that notion.

       My second reason for learning ASL has to do with me as a person. I suffer from social anxiety. I'm by far not one of the worse cases, but it's there. I find myself speaking less and less at home, at school, at church. I will not go as far as saying I suffer from mutism because that is absolutely not the case. I was reading a book the other day on Wattpad ( I have forgotten the name) that was about a person who suffered from mutism because they were so depressed that they believed that they were too worthless to speak, so they used sign language. I became enamored with this because there are so many times that I would like to display my thoughts, but I don't want to use verbal words.  There are so many times a day where I wish that everyone would shut up.

      I began to research mutism and I found that there are several different kinds.

      Did you know that less than 2% of the world population speaks sign language?  How many people out there are mute and have no way to communicate?

   I decided to learn sign language to help the people who suffer from mutism find their voices.

The Mind Behind the Blog

       The mind of a teenager is a complex thing. We are just beginning to figure out the world and ourselves. There are many topics that teenagers are hesitant to ask adults for fear of judgement. That's is the exact reason I am starting this blog. I hope this will become a place that will hold intelligent conversation while being a judgement free zone.

       I am Liz, the author of this blog. I am currently in high school in the graduating year of 2019. I am a huge supporter of the LGBT+ community. I love music, YouTube and video making. My favorite musical artists are Troye Sivan, Panic! at the Disco, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy and Twenty Øne Piløts.

       I hope to inspire and initiate conversation. This blog will consist of conversation topics and little snippets of my life. I hope you all enjoy.